Take Time to Smell the Roses

Don was like a father to all of us, someone that we admired and loved. We all feel blessed to have had him in our lives for over 30 years. Each of us can recall memorable moments with Don. One of those memories for me was during a visit to Mom and Don’s home in Medina. I shared with them all about my busy day. As I was getting ready to leave, I gave them each a hug “goodbye”. As I hugged Don, he quietly said, “Don’t forget to take time to smell the roses, Ruth”. Don was that individual who took time to smell the roses and reflect on nature. This story was just one of many that the three of us shared when we sat down to prepare for today’s service. In picking our stories for today, we came up with a way to organize our thoughts, by using the meaning behind each color of a rose. So the memories we share today match the symbolism of the color of the rose. The rose was one of Don’s favorite flowers.

CHERYL: Purple is the color of enchantment, love at first sight.

It’s not often that you get to see the start of love, especially that of your mom. There isn’t a word in the dictionary that can describe the all-encompassing love that my mom experienced when she fell head over heels for Don. A nurse at the hospital that I work at once described this love as Twitterpated. When you area twitterpated you cannot think clearly, you read poetry, smile a lot, and gaze into the sunset holding hands and talking on the phone for hours. No matter what is happening in the world, it is ok because you are with the one you love. This is the word I would use to describe Mom’s feelings when she fell in love with Don 30 some years ago. I saw a new side of my mom, a side I had never seen before …and yes I think I liked it.

RUTH: Orange is the color of passion and excitement

Don possessed a true passion for travel. From safaris, to villages, Don and mom traveled the world and brought glimpses of foreign treasures back through the infamous Sutherland slideshows that we all anticipated upon arriving at their house.

Mom and Don also had a passion for the desert. Our family was lucky because we spent many days in Palm Springs with Mom and Don. Don’s love of the sunshine, date shakes, hot tubs and handpicked grapefruits. This love of the desert was contagious. We soon bought a place in the desert where we could celebrate holidays and birthdays together. Because my birthday fell during the holiday break, we were able to celebrate my birthday with them. One of my favorite birthdays was dinner at the Falls in which Don acquainted me to my first watermelon martini.

HUGH: Yellow is the color of friendship, joy and happiness

In the eighties I went to the San Juan’s to see Shaw Island. It was the first time that I would see the beautiful property that Don had purchased for his future home and the property he

shared with some of his doctor friends. I remember my immediate reaction “Wow… this is heaven on earth”…. I felt it was a privilege and an honor to visit this unspoiled treasure. Over the years I made sure to always join my mom and Don during the second weekend in July. This was their traditional family gathering that we called "the Salmon Bake." With each visit I was awed by a beautiful ferryboat ride from Anacortes to Shaw. I was charmed by the Little Portions store, which for years was run by the sisters of Benedictine. For me, and later for my family, going to Shaw each year was a highlight of our summer. This annual event showcased Don's meticulously prepared, delicious salmon. It was also a time of squirt gun fights, badminton, ping-pong, long walks, and long talks with the extended family. One of my favorite things to do was to go out in the little boat with Don, his dog, and tour the islands. There we would spot eagles, otters, whatever wildlife was out there. For a city slicker, it was like opening the pages of the national geographic, in real time.

CHERYL: Pink is the color of admiration, happiness and joyfulness

Being a nurse I had the unique opportunity to see the many faces of the man we are honoring today. I worked at Overlake Hospital on the FBC and in the nursery. I got to see Don as not only a father figure, but as a Pediatrician in this clinical setting. He had a unique ability to always listen to what the nurses had to say about their patients and formulate his plan of action around it. He was kind, polite and put those that he worked with ease. A moment that stands out during my time there: I was in the nursery coming around the corner walking to the floor. It was dark. I was the only one in the hall. From the opposite direction I heard a unique sound. It was a whistling Doctor Don on his early morning rounds.

HUGH: Peach is the color of gratitude, appreciation, and sincerity

I am grateful for the opportunity that I had to share in Don’s life, and to have experienced his love of nature. I specifically remember one of my first walks with Don. Our destination was Neck Point and I was thinking another walk, good exercise.

Halfway through our walk, Don was about 20 yards behind me, at the side of the road looking at the bushes. My immediate thought was “come on Don, I thought we were on a walk.”

Don called me over, “Hugh, he said, look at this… look at the dew and how it highlights the spider web. He had me looking at every intricate line of this web. It really was breathtaking…

…And then he had me look around… there were hundreds of these woven masterpieces.

Over the years, Don introduced me to the artwork of snowflakes, the beauty of many sunsets and the grace with which the Washington State ferry quietly glided by, with its lights twinkling and reflecting off the water, as it passed through WASP passage and exited to the right.

Through my experiences with Don, I learned to have a greater appreciation for beauty and nature and so many things that we often rush by without taking time to appreciate.

RUTH: Red is the color of love – a way of saying “I love you”

When they moved to Emerald Heights, Mom and Don moved closer and I was privileged to spend time with them after work and weekends. I witness first hand Mom and Don’s love for one another. One of my fondest memories happened this past December when I look them on a little evening trip to Molbak’s. They both were excited to be outside, admiring the Christmas lights. When we got to Molbak’s I helped Mom get into her wheelchair and Don pushed Mom into Molbak’s admiring all the poinsettias. I got a little ahead of them and looked back to see that Don and Mom had stopped at the counter. As I looked back, I could see that Don had grabbed a piece of mistletoe and was holding it over Mom, giving her a kiss. It was so sweet.

RUTH: Last is the color White which is symbolic of honor, reverence and new beginnings

Honor and reverence are certainly what we have for Don. We have lost a great man, father figure, and husband to our mother. Because of Don we have learned to appreciate the little things in life. Don’s life lessons and guidance are a part of us all now, reminding us to live and love. So when you leave today, we ask that you take a rose home with you and remember and reflect on one of Don’s life lessons, “Take Time to Smell the Roses”.

A Letter From Dr. Mikesell

When our daughter Melissa was born almost 33 years ago, Tom and I chose Don to be her doctor. She was in bed with me, an hour old, when he came to see her. He moved his magic hands over her body and pronounced her “perfect.” It meant she was perfect!

At one of our early visits, Don invited me to join Bellevue Clinic as pediatrician. So, casually by today’s hiring procedures, did I join Don, Jim McGrath and Stu Minkin for the happiest years of my practice life.

On my first day in the office, Don gave me a hammer because I’d worried aloud to him about properly treating ingrown nails. And he gave me my first patient, a very upset, disabled teen who needed an exam, because Bellevue Clinic now had a female pediatrician. Thus began my decades-long association with the “Whistling Doctor”—I loved hearing him walk down the hallway toward my office.

Don was gentle, quiet-spoken, and with the help of Jody could see more patients on a winter influenza day than any of us, except possibly Stu Minkin. I could never match Don’s effortless speed, but I secretly wondered what I might have been able to do if I had had a Jody. Don and Jody worked together like the right and left hands on one body, so you can see this was not a wish that could be satisfied, and I didn't have to face the obvious fact that I never, ever could keep up with them.

Don and Jim McGrath were the first two pediatricians at the fledgling Bellevue Clinic. Though they had different personalities and practice styles, between them they set the tone for all our years of practice together—of equitable treatment of even the newest doctors. Of mutual respect, courtesy and compassion toward staff and patients. For doctors, staff, and I would like to think patients, there was a family feeling to being part of Bellevue Clinic.

Though I haven’t seen Don and Jody in years, Don’s death leaves an empty corner in my heart. Know that my thoughts are with you all—especially Jody.

With my love, Kathy Mikesell

Memorial Slideshow

Family Remembrance 2

I am Bruce Sutherland Don’s son.
Big Shoes to Fill
(Thank people)


My Dad left some very big shoes to fill. I want to share some memories of him from the viewpoint of his child and how I hope we can try to fill those shoes.

I remember going into the basement of my Grandmothers house as a child and looking for treasures. I found fossils and shells that my Dad had collected. I also found some rusted spurs, a bullet mold and other items. These items were given to him by the Dr. who had cared for him after his bike accident. Some of these things are on display on the memory table. My Dad’s love of collecting rocks and shells and things has been passed on to me and my children and grandchildren. I think that we will be able to fill his treasure hunting shoes.

I have many memories of my Dad as a Dr. When I was 4 or 5 he would take me early in the morning to check newborns at the Seattle hospitals, as there was no hospital on the Eastside. Many times as I waited for him the nurses would tell me that they could tell when he was there by his whistling. One of his favorite songs to whistle was colonel Boogeys march from the Bridge on the River Kwai. You will have a chance to hear this song as we eat cookies and share memories after the service.

My Dad would make house calls, his Dr.’s bag is also on display along with his medical school microscope on the memory table. I would often go on house calls with him and wait in the car. One time he came out of a patient’s home with some vegetables. He explained that the parents couldn’t afford to pay him so they gave him vegetables from their garden. That was the type of caring man that he was. Another evening he had to leave. When he got home he explained that a boy had been doing the back float in Lake Sammamish and been bitten in the butt by a muskrat and needed stitches. Stories like that I always will remember. Over the years at high school reunions many people have told me that Dad was a great Dr. for them and also their kids.
He was a kind and caring Dr. and those shoes will be hard to fill.

Dad had a love for all of God’s creation. His love of nature, the beauty of the mountains, the flowers, the animals, the san juan Islands knew no limits. Shaw Island was his Camelot. He often took us on family hikes. When he started mountain climbing he pursued it with a passion, climbing Mt. Baker, Adams, Hood, Rainer, and many others. One cold winter day I went with him to climb a mountain in the Olympics. It was snowing so hard we could hardly see, it was only when we reached the summit that we could see that our whole group had climbed the wrong mountain. Some of his climbing gear is also on display.

Dad knew that I loved seeing wild animals as a child. He and Jody took me on a two week trip to Africa a few years back to fulfill my life long dream. I know that my children and grandchildren love nature, so I think we can fill these shoes.

My Dad had a great love and respect for all human kind. For many years he carried in his wallet a saying about not judging others until we have walked a mile in their shoes.
One of his favorite readings came from “For whom the bells tolled”, a story about the bells tolling when someone dies.
“let those of us who hear the bells, pause in our footsteps, rethink our goals, and perhaps, just perhaps, find time to live each day, each hour more fully . And another quote from someone else. “I shall pass through this world but once. Any good therefore that I can do, or any kindness that I can show to any human being let me do it now, We can help fill his shoes of compassion by sharing our love with others.

Family was important to Dad. My Grandfather was the only boy in his family and my Dad only had sisters. He was so excited when I had a son and so excited when my youngest son had a boy to carry on the Sutherland name. He stressed that fact that ladies were special and were to be treated specially. You were expected to open doors for them or help them carry things. The lessons that I have learned from this have been practiced and passed on. My daughter Lea will tell you that I treated her differently than my sons. This was not always to her liking. People tease me about how much I cherish my daughter in laws Katie and Jocelyn, but I do.

I have seen this love and caring for family demonstrated so strongly by Ruth and Cheryl in the loving care and attention that they gave my Dad and Jody. Others have shown care but Ruth and Cheryl’s care was exceptional. And I want to publicly thank them now. My Dad’s granddaughter Meagan and family have put hours of love and caring into the making of a video you will see shortly. The greatest demonstration of love and caring has been the love my Dad showed for Jody. Those shoes will be very very difficult to fill. I would like to ask all the family members to stand , it will take all of us working together to try to fill those shoes. OK sit down.

I will miss my Dad greatly but I will always have his legacy and these memories. Everything in this service is tied to his life, the Dr. bag, the songs, the peanut butter cookies and the love of family and friends.

He left a poem to be read to people by Ilsa Richardson

To those I love
If I should ever leave you
Whom I love
To go along the Silent Way
Grieve not,
Nor speak of me with tears,
But laugh and talk
Of me as if I were
Beside you there.
(I’d come I’d come,
could I but find a way!
But would not tears and grief
Be barriers?)
And when you hear a song,
Or see a bird
I loved, please do not let
The thought of me
Be sad…. For I am
Loving you just as
I always have…
You were so good to me!
There are so many things
I wanted still
To do…so many things to say to you…
Remember that I
Did not fear.. It was
Just leaving you
That was so hard to face…
We cannot see Beyond…
But this I know:
I loved you so..twas heaven
Here with you!

Family Remembrance

Family Remembrance:

I am Nancy Sutherland, Don’s Daughter-In-Law…his son Bruce’s wife.

Don Sutherland A Merciful Man….

Shakespeare said:

The quality of mercy is not strained,       

It droppeth as the gentle rain from heaven  Upon the place beneath.

It is twice blest:  It blesses him that gives and him that takes.

Don was a merciful, compassionate man…it was a quality that marked his life to the end.

You all have an obituary in your programs but we wanted to take an opportunity to slightly expand on a few points in Don’s life:

1. Don was an original California boy—he loved the sun, Valencia oranges from his family orange grove, and the outdoors.

The bicycle accident that changed his life is mentioned in the obituary. Don wrote a long story that centered around how he and his sisters were trying to obtain an anniversary gift for his parents. He had to go to the store on his bicycle to get the gift. Just before leaving he ate cold potatoes and peanut butter—this was the start of a reported lifetime love of peanut butter. He crashed his bicycle and ended up with a serious head injury and remained in a coma for several days. He reports receiving incredible care from his personal physician, Dr. Domann. Dr. Domann’s merciful intervention and interest inspired him to go into medicine.

2.  We have received numerous accounts in the online guest book and in messages from family, friends, and strangers about the impact of Don’s medical practice on the Bellevue and Seattle communities. Don was one of the founding members of the Bellevue Clinic. The Bellevue Clinic brought primary care to the Eastside in the early days of Bellevue and over many years. Our children received their pediatric care from their Grandpa.  Not too many children get excited to go to the doctor. However in our household, going to the doctor meant being treated like a prince or princess by office staff and getting to go to Grandpa’s office afterward for candy.  The occasional rude shock of receiving a shot was overshadowed by the positives in these visits.  Although I wonder if Lois still bears bruises from trying to give David (our youngest son) immunizations.  All in all, the clinic visits were a calm, pleasant, good experience with their grandfather and his quiet, merciful ways.

3.  I was blessed to receive Don’s mercy when in high school; Bruce and I had been dating a few months when I accidentally opened my father’s car door into side of my left eye.  The gash bled heavily and was gaping. My parents were loathe to take us to doctors unless absolutely necessary and this injury was deemed to be not in need of more than a bandaid. When I arrived at Bellevue High School with my bandaid leaking blood, Bruce asked me what happened? I burst into tears—it really hurt and I was worried about it. He called his Dad and explained the situation. We were allowed to leave school and we went to the Bellevue Clinic—Don checked the laceration and saw it needed stitching. After a telephone consultation w/ my parents, I received 5 stitches.  A wound that would have left an unsightly facial scar was skillfully repaired and is barely visible today.  When I tried to pay for the services after the stitches were removed, I was told to keep my money; Dr. Sutherland had taken care of things. 

Mercy blesses those that both give and receive.

4.  Don took such joy in the visions and simple pleasures we enjoy as humans.  He was quick to point out a lovely sunset, vista, or flower. He so enjoyed creating works of art in wood carving or admiring and acquiring artwork to grace and beautify his home.  His love of things “beautiful” was “as gentle rain…twice blest.” 

5.  Genetics are a wonderful and “merciful” thing.  Although Don has now left us, I see his legacy lives directly in my family. His Grandson Greg has his quiet, methodical, and caring ways.  His Granddaughter Lea has his keen intelligence and insight.  Most surprising and actually comforting is that the sound of his voice is still with us…Talk to my husband Bruce and our youngest son David. Especially if you call these men on the telephone, you will be amazed at the vocal similarity.  His voice lives on in Bruce and David… perhaps one day we will hear it in one of the great grandsons Ethan, Caleb, or Kyle when they become men as well. What a blessing that would be.

6.  Finally Don’s love for Jody was a thing to behold in this last year and especially in his last few days. Last Spring Don had a “near brush with death.”  He was in critical condition but obviously survived that crisis. As we gathered around him, Jody’s health was such that she was unable to be at his side; he was very ill but his only complaint was that he wished “Jode” could be with him.

In the few days before he passed recently, I told Jody she was a real “warrior.”  After a lifetime of extending kindness and mercy to others, in his pain all he wanted was Jody at his side and to hold his hand as he dealt with his final moments.  Many of you know that Jody has health issues and even to provide this took extreme courage and strength, something she surprised us with that she had in reserve.

Jody, thank you for the incredible gift of love over the years and especially most recently that you demonstrated to Don; it was also a gift of love and mercy to us all. 

I count myself as truly blessed to be a part of Don’s family and to have known him. 

God have mercy on his soul.

Memorial Service Reception Photos